JamesS
04-13-2006, 02:01 PM
You know you've been in the martial arts too long when you....
* can't walk by anyone in your school without exchanging a flurry of mock strikes and kicks.
* have the urge to bow everytime you leave or enter a room.
* are introduced to someone and you bow to greet them.
* think to yourself while trying on pants: "Nice pants, but I don't think I can kick in them well."
* find your practicing staff techniques in miniature with your pencil during dull meetings.
* find yourself practicing stances while waiting in line.
* practice your techniques / forms in the parking lot while waiting for someone to come out of the store, workplace. (and almost get the police called upon you because the manager at work / store thinks your weird.)
* open and close doors with spinning kicks.
* open doors with a punch or an intentionally executed palm strike.
* buy shoes because they are flexible or have steel toes.
* when buying those shoes, you don't walk or jog around the store, you practice pivots, sweeps, stances, and kicks.
* when you hit your head on a low doorway or ceiling, and in anger, kick it and damage it.
* practice blocks while driving.
* do Finger Set while sitting at a stop light.
* use various strikes to turn lights on and off (yes, this includes your feet, too.)
* see people covered in a blanket of little red cross-hairs on all their vital targets.
* can't enjoy a martial art flick anymore because of the unrealistic moves.
* notice that you never never stand with your arms crossed or your hands in your pockets.
* notice that you always have to sit to face the most people in a cafeteria, restaurant, meeting room. (Can't have your back to the door!
* keep a martial arts weapon close at hand while you sleep.
* have mastered the reflex to mentally imagine a messy homicide everytime someone asks if you're a black belt after learning you practice martial arts.
* don't use any tools when splitting firewood.
* spend more time surfing martial arts forums instead of doing actual work.
* don't care if the other patrons are looking at you funny.
:)
please add more humor stories or jokes.
After all humility is part of your training!http://forums.elite-fighters.com/editpost.php?do=editpost&p=583#
Big Grin
and heres one for Lance C
How many kenpoists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
JamesS
* can't walk by anyone in your school without exchanging a flurry of mock strikes and kicks.
* have the urge to bow everytime you leave or enter a room.
* are introduced to someone and you bow to greet them.
* think to yourself while trying on pants: "Nice pants, but I don't think I can kick in them well."
* find your practicing staff techniques in miniature with your pencil during dull meetings.
* find yourself practicing stances while waiting in line.
* practice your techniques / forms in the parking lot while waiting for someone to come out of the store, workplace. (and almost get the police called upon you because the manager at work / store thinks your weird.)
* open and close doors with spinning kicks.
* open doors with a punch or an intentionally executed palm strike.
* buy shoes because they are flexible or have steel toes.
* when buying those shoes, you don't walk or jog around the store, you practice pivots, sweeps, stances, and kicks.
* when you hit your head on a low doorway or ceiling, and in anger, kick it and damage it.
* practice blocks while driving.
* do Finger Set while sitting at a stop light.
* use various strikes to turn lights on and off (yes, this includes your feet, too.)
* see people covered in a blanket of little red cross-hairs on all their vital targets.
* can't enjoy a martial art flick anymore because of the unrealistic moves.
* notice that you never never stand with your arms crossed or your hands in your pockets.
* notice that you always have to sit to face the most people in a cafeteria, restaurant, meeting room. (Can't have your back to the door!
* keep a martial arts weapon close at hand while you sleep.
* have mastered the reflex to mentally imagine a messy homicide everytime someone asks if you're a black belt after learning you practice martial arts.
* don't use any tools when splitting firewood.
* spend more time surfing martial arts forums instead of doing actual work.
* don't care if the other patrons are looking at you funny.
:)
please add more humor stories or jokes.
After all humility is part of your training!http://forums.elite-fighters.com/editpost.php?do=editpost&p=583#
Big Grin
and heres one for Lance C
How many kenpoists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
JamesS